February 2009
70 posts
Finally, a one-stop destination for Jucy Lucys,... →
If this place is actually legit — and I am still not certain it is anything more than a neon fever dream in the Midway — it would almost certainly be the closest humankind has ever come to achieving the impossible dream of opening This Is Why You Are Fat: The Restaurant.
Before you scoff the word “impossible,” remember: St. Paul is the town that gave the world the Gangster...
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“I just saw a sign for a lost cat named “Movies.” I love that cat...”
– Via mollypriesmeyer on Twitter.
Minneapolis, you have given me two heart-rending separation stories this week. I am pulling for you, Movies the Cat, and I am pulling for you and Clark, stoner girl. I’m pulling hard for all of you.
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The current state of my apartment.
Fifteen cat ladies moved into a one-bedroom apartment.
After a brandy-fueled evening of speechifying and posturing, they sign a declaration (“The South 12th Avenue Statement”) designating the space a collectivist socialist commune. They all sleep in the same queen-sized bed.
They get rid of the cats.
No one has done the dishes.
Why did they eat so much pizza?
All fifteen of the...
"You're already paying rent on the place, anyway." →
Here is a piece I wrote for MNArtists this month on five homes, past and present, that have served as art exhibition spaces in Minneapolis and St. Paul.
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“What made me want to write about this stuff…is listening to the music and...”
– Dave Marsh, in an undated interview here.
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Selected adjectives from pages 326-327 of the 1983...
empty
light-weight
uninteresting
ersatz
disgusting
unlistenable
predictable
strident
humorless
overripe
truly rotten
obnoxious
collegiate
sophomoric
petulant
sanctimonuous
unbearable
insipid
didactic
This missed connection is the stoner romantic... →
impound lot. clark? blunts and tv? - w4m - 21 (the line)
you forgot to get my number ya dummy
You can just read those eighteen perfect words, and by the end, you’ve already formed in your head the complete plot of the film Snow Emergency, starring Justin Long as Clark, Natasha Lyonne (in her big comeback bid) as the girl, and featuring Craig Robinson and Bill Hader as the clerks, with a...
Ineffectual karaoke tricks, #1.
Singing Kate Bush’s “Wuthering Heights” in a very deep, masculine voice with the gender-specific pronouns reversed, so that the song is from Heathcliff’s point of view.
It can get really confusing towards the middle part, and you have to be really quick on your feet about it: “how could I leave you / when you needed to possess me? / you hated me / but you loved me,...
All your Minneapolis ephemera needs, now in one... →
It looks like Paul, whose Flickstream is one of the best repositories for Minneapolis miscellenea out there, has started a Tumblr. Expect lots of great images of old hotels and streetcars, print advertisements and images of George Banks that probably once made your grandfather tear up over General Mills cereal products on game day.
Actually, your grand-dad had good reason to cry: looks like...
"Where the fuck at 5 o'clock in the morning can I... →
David Wojnarowicz reads from his work “Fevers,” as a benefit for the Needle Exchange, at the Drawing Center in New York City in 1992, shortly before his death. Sad and hilarious and not particularly work-safe (unless you work at the Needle Exchange or the Drawing Center).
“Ben Stiller is the Mel Gibson of comedy. Everyone acclaimed the post-racism...”
– Oscar Preview 2009 | n+1
Why, I wonder, go with “Corregidor” when “Midway” or “Guadalcanal” would do the same trick and seem a less show-offy? Still, very funny, and it’s always appealing to hear someone say these things (especially when there’s...
GPOYNBW continues, across town in Kingfield. →
A photo of the Butter Bakery Cafe, via EKF.
Hurray for GPOYNBW.
"500,000 for the 2020 Olympics in the Twin Cities"... →
We’re not particularly sold on this idea at all, but if that’s what it takes to get a god-damned monorail built between the southside and our favorite bars in Northeast, than you can count us in.
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Used art books for under ten dollars. →
Including a Chris Burden catalog for twenty-four cents.
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On the 21A.
Creepy guy: So, honey, where do you work?
Irritable woman: Hennepin County.
Creepy guy: Yeah? Where at?
Irritable woman: I work at the morgue.
Creepy guy: Hmmm. [pause] I've never seen you there before.
“Hey Andy, it’s Paul D. It’s Monday night — but, uh, well, what...”
– The poet Paul D. Dickinson gets the award for best lay-off voicemail.
“The city of Minneapolis is a man in his late thirties who made a tremendous...”
– Charles Rumford Walker, in the introduction to American City: A Rank and File History of Minneapolis, from 1937.
This is one of my favorite books. It’s a little creaky in places, of course, but covers in perfect detail the events leading up to the 1934 Truckers’ Strike. There’s a...
Programming note.
We here at South 12th were unfortunately laid off from our “straight” job today. Posting may be less regular, or more regular, depending on circumstances.
Job leads and food stamps may be emailed to andysturdevant@gmail.com.
Sad news from Bob Kholos. →
“Saigon Bob” Kholos is the author of a political blog I’ve enjoyed following for about a year. I’ve never been certain how old he is, exactly, but his gentle, good-natured commentary seems to come from another era. Reading his bio, he cuts an almost Zelig-like figure across the political landscape of the 1960s and ’70s, serving in the infantry in Vietnam, and then...
Happy Valentine’s Day. Here is a...
Your new Minneapolis blog.
One of the buildings I work near has an old elevator with the floors marked thusly:
P - PENTHOUSE
6
5 - SKYWAY
4
3 - LOBBY *
2
1
In conclusion, Penthouse Skyway is a good name of your new Minneapolis blog. Or, alternately, Skyway Penthouse.
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“Perhaps somewhat less widely known is her appearance in a YouTube post, Kate and...”
– From Kate Dollenmayer’s Wikipedia entry.
Nothing “perhaps” about that. Here is the YouTube post in question, presented unexpurgated and in its entirety.
In defense of the drunk dial.
Apparently, there is a new movie out called The Man Who Was Not Into You — and I’m sorry I’m just now getting to this; my ascetic lifestyle doesn’t allow much interface with the outside world save for, oh, reading Tess Lynch’s blog and overhearing cryptic conversations about dance-themed television shows on the bus while I quietly daydream about Tania Hearst and...
Meanwhile, as ice-choked Louisville lingers in... →
…Nate goes to the West End to buy pig parts in a garbage bag and gets 1170% of his daily recommended cholesterol intake in this latest installation of In the Kitchen at Parties.
"But an equally big reason home run numbers are up... →
The world’s greatest Socialist sportswriter, Dave Zirin, on steroids and the encroaching lameness of baseball at the hands of its homerun derby-crazed overlords.
"A lot of strange things happen in this world....
“I often imagine that South Twelfth spends a lot of his down time watching the hard-hitting films of the 1970s,” you may sometimes think as you read this. You are correct. Last night was Paul Schrader’s Hardcore, from 1979.
This from the “Trivia” section at IMDb:
The city of Grand Rapids, Michigan refused to allow any more movies to be filmed in its limits...
